14 Apr April Showers, bring your Mom some flowers!
BY JAMIE ENGLE
Ah, mothers! At once the center – and torment – of our universe! A topic so complicated that even Disney tends to leave it alone, and yet, we try to say it all one day a year.
Perhaps you’ve seen the poem about mother-child relationships:
At 3 years: “Mommy, I love you.”
At 10 years: “Mom, whatever!”
At 16 years: “My mom is so annoying.”
At 18 years: “I’m leaving this house.”
At 25 years: “Mom, you were right.”
At 30 years: “I want to go to Mom’s house.”
At 50 years: “I don’t want to lose my mom.”
At 70 years: “I would give up everything to have my Mom here with me.”
Moms of tween and teens are probably saying, “Come on, 25!” (I know I am!).
Positive support and encouragement from mothers and mother figures is so absolutely critical to character development. I almost typed “child development,” but then realized that even now, in my fifties, my mom still influences me every day. Her words echo in my head as I work through plans and decisions.
Raising my daughters, there are so many things I do that my mom did – some that I didn’t even realize. For my mom’s 70th birthday, my sister put together a memory book with stories and letters from family and friends. Thanks to the Internet and social media, she combed far and wide to create a book with close to 100 memories.
One thing our friends and cousins mentioned was that Mom always had time to rub your head or give a quick hug as she walked by. I was thrilled to read how it impacted everyone – especially since walking by and tweaking my kids’ toes when they’re kicked back watching television is something I love to do, much to their chagrin and sometimes irritation! Yet, I can remember our foreign exchange student, Anna giving a huge smile when she was included in this ritual “harassment.”
As important as positive influences can be, the negative can be influential as well. Garnering the courage and strength to forge ahead despite the lack of support and encouragement creates some truly amazing people with incredible stories.
Catching a sweet mom-child moment at church or at the park always brings a smile and a certain wistfulness for days gone by.
Even sweeter is seeing mom and a tween/teen laughing together- those moments can be so few and far between sometimes!
My daughter and I saw a clip on “mom heroes” and she asked me if I knew any mom heroes. I said yes, my mom because she raised seven kids after the early death of my father (the oldest, me, was 15; the youngest was three).
What I didn’t say was that every mom is a hero in some way or another. Working moms, stay-at-home moms, long distance moms, step-moms, mother figures… each of them is a hero, doing things they never imagined and balancing more than anyone knows. They discover traits they never knew they had, find strength where they thought there was none.
It may be many years before your mom can appreciate for herself all she’s done and all she’s meant to her children and those around her. Show her now. April showers bring May flowers… bring your mom some flowers any time you can.